Too Much

Flowers for the children.

These flowers.

These flowers are for all the children who have been harmed in any way from this almost constant spate of mass shootings. They are for those who died in their places of worship. Two safe places that are no longer safe.

Seeing the pictures of the children coming out of their school with their arms raised yesterday, just about broke me. It’s true. We are seeing this on an almost weekly basis. My prayer for myself is that I don’t become jaded. That I don’t get so much into myself that I don’t see the pain in others. And, that once in a while, I see the joy in others.

These days it seems like seeing joy is getting harder and harder to find. That isn’t right. Children should be nothing but joy. Oh sure, they have their meltdowns. Even that is a kind of joy. It’s part of their growth. However, when I talk to little ones, they seem to have a kind of resignation in their voice. They talk about their active shooter drills. They know that, not that it might come, but that it will come.

That’s horrible. It makes me so sad. My eyes are wet as I write.

I know that we can’t go back in time. But, the worst thing I feared when I was growing up was my parents wrath for doing something I shouldn’t. Even that was gentle.


I don’t know what to do. It’s well above my pay grade. I know that we can “vote the bastards out,” but can we change the trajectory that we seem to be headed on? I think that comes in small steps. Maybe be running for office in some teeny tiny election. Fix what we can fix. Hope that it moves upward.

An old friend of mine tweeted yesterday about wanting some big things to be fixed. Now. I replied, “run for office.” She thinks I’m kidding. I’m not. She’s smart, talented, a life long learner. No. She won’t fix the issues she wants fixed. But, she can fix something.

I’m really sorry about this. It seems like one long rant or vent. It’s not. It’s my thoughts after a really bad day. I thought I had problems. Nah. Mine didn’t even register on any scale.

The picture. Dog walk. She found this place. I just did what I always do. No lesson to share except keep your eyes open.


And, the fine folks at WordPress removed the spell check function. Yeah. We are all perfect writers.


Leave a Comment

  1. It is a horrible tragedy. I feel terrible for everyone who is affected by this.
    I also hope we don’t become jaded or “used to” this.
    While the issues children face here are a bit different, it is the same in that it’s difficult to find genuine joy in their expressions. I feel that “humanity” is ruining the world, at a pace that is accelerating like we’ve never seen before.


      • I can imagine it is a delicate balance. We don’t want to become too overwhelmed-and-then-jaded, yet, we can’t simply ignore it. Either way, it is a terrible tragedy.

        As gun laws are quite strict here, most crimes are committed by knives and such. But still terrifying. Regarding being “jaded” – as you may know, people committing suicide by jumping in front of trains is an ongoing problem. I don’t what troubles me more, the fact that so many of us are pushed to the point to end lives like this, or the fact that most people see the news and simply shrug “oh another one.”

        Liked by 1 person

      • It’s the deep stress of take ones own life that bothers me. Where I come from, it’s sort of cowardly because of what and who you leave behind. They end up dealing with the mess you just left behind.


  2. I love the photo, Ray. It’s beautiful. And I hate that almost every day I think about my grandchildren at school and have so much concern for them. I worry about campus violence. My two granddaughters go to the same elementary school I attended more than 50 years ago. The campus is so familiar to me, but I never had lockdown drills! I wouldn’t have known the term “active shooter.” (I did crowd under my desk preparing for an A-bomb!) but even with that ridiculous drill, I didn’t have any fear. My granddaughters, 11 and 9, know what happens in schools across the country. It’s heartbreaking to me, and I’ve cried tears, as well. Anyone who doesn’t deeply concerns me!

    Liked by 1 person

    • You and I grew up about the same way. Towards the end of my grade/high school we didn’t even have under the desk drills. It was peaceful. This has to stop. I’m not sure except to vote the guys out of office who won’t do anything. Keep the replacements on a very short leash. I had an exchange of emails with Kamala Harris, not one of her people, but her. In her last comments she suggested that I run for something. Maybe we all should consider that.


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